My Light
Cold, hard shards of glass
Pierce my empty heart
My eyes, tears of loneliness
Whenever we’re apart
Being my sun and my moon
You brighten my dark sky
Darkness I feel without you
Impossible to deny
Longing for you strong arms
And your gentle touch
Darkness without you frightens me
Memories of you I tightly clutch
You brighten my days
And light my lonely nights
Your presence next to me
Fills my heart with delight
Dreaming of you in the dark night
Seems so real you are here
Awakening to your gentle caress
With you here, there is no fear
Together as we are meant to be
Fills my heart with bliss
As our longing lips touch
I ‘m filled with love and happiness
Quatrain Poem
This is an apt poem for the season. Again, I'm sorry, I don't know who posted this. What this poem has in spades is authentic emotion. This is life, this is something (if we are lucky) we all feel at some point, and that makes it very powerful. The Quatrain works pretty well here too. A direction you might take this is to show more of the lover? What is this person like? This character seems infallible, a perfect creature. What specific traits make this person an individual, and create these emotions in the narrator?
ReplyDeleteSorry. This is Debbie. Thanks for your comments. Debbie
ReplyDeleteA wonderful Valentine's poem, and as Anna said, we don't see the object of your affection clearly. What the poem is really about, for me, is your (Debbie's) feelings. This is good as a Valentine, I think, because you are letting the other person know how you feel, not listing his qualities...
ReplyDeleteBut it could also be interesting (maybe more interesting to the outside observer) if we saw more of the personalities, especially of the lover, here.
I could see that would be hard to do in a quatrain form, though. I think you did really well with the form.