Nameless
Debbie Johnson
Sept 14, 2010
My name was given me,
An infant I had no choice.
Mother was spiritual and my Biblical name a chance to rejoice,
I should rise up and others would hear my voice.
Debra, most common girl’s name of 1962,
But the Deborah spelling made me feel inadequate, blue.
I felt since my name was biblical, I should be better than the rest,
Be perfectly honest and get an A on every test.
Much thought was given to changing my name once and for last,
To have my own identity and leave the past.
I pondered a change to my middle name Ellen,
While not biblical should get me to heaven.
As I grew I realized how many my age had this name.
It made me sad
I longed for one of my own, not a variation of what many girls had.
Deb, Debbie, Debby, Deborah and Debra too much the same.
If folks aren’t careful when using these
I often don’t know if they are speaking of me
Or some other Debbie.
Most deal with the confusion by calling me Debbie J.
I guess for now I will keep it that way.
Debbie, you have really cleaned this up--taken out unnecessary words, changed some grammatical structure for more clarity. And thank you for taking the line about "outcast" out. I realize that it was the biggest thing that unsettled me in the stanza.
ReplyDeleteThanks Ruth!
ReplyDeleteDebbie that was a neat story to tell about your name and how it came into being.
ReplyDeleteAgain, I am fascinated by this way to frame an upbringing. This need to feel unique is universal. I'm unclear why changing your name to Ellen should get you heaven. I also am unclear now in this version why the speaker thinks she should be better than the rest because of her biblical name. Many people's names are biblical. The interesting requirements of being the child of a parent who wants perfection has been lost in this version. I think you should really decide why this means so much to you as an idea, and develop the feelings behind this poem. It may inform what specific images and details you can include to show your point rather than just telling it. Thanks so much Debbie! Debbie J. You are one of a kind, I can tell.
ReplyDelete