When Our Souls Dance
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My love for you stays strong and true
When our souls dance
We were young and our love was new
We took a chance
Remember kicking up our heels
That delightful way new love feels
Our lives overflow with romance
When our souls dance
You fell for me and I for you
Love found perchance
Little Brown Church we vowed 'I do'
We've aged can't prance
Older now our dancing steps slow
But love does continue to grow
Our lives remain full of romance
When our souls dance
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
|
What a beautiful fun poem. Its cadence works particularly well here, making it a poem to dance to. On that note, there are a few places where the cadence doesn't work as well. You use the words delightful and overflow, which are the only two words over two syllables. For this reason they stand out. You might also consider breaking up "we've aged can't prance" with a comma between aged and can't, because when read out loud it is natural to pause here. I love the feeling of this poem, it makes me smile. I really want to see these two people dancing. The image here of the little brown church provides an excellent grounding in a setting. How else might you ground this poem with images?
ReplyDelete